The best Christmas tradition in the family is to wear a horribly ugly Christmas sweater and drink eggnog. The problem is that we always know who’s on our naughty or nice list, so we want to make sure everyone else has as much fun as possible. This year I decided it was time for an overhaul of this tradition- starting with my own sweaters!
Lila was killing time scrolling through Instagram at home, when she saw a post for some ugly Christmas sweaters. The company was offering 40% off everything in the store, and Lila had to take advantage of that deal before it expired. She went into her closet and looked over all the clothes she could wear with an ugly Christmas sweater. As she contemplated what to do, there was knocking on the front door. It seemed like strange timing for someone to be visiting so late at night but Lila opened up anyway because they never talked too much anyways. When she opened the door, there were two men standing outside wearing Santa hats who gave her looks as if they wanted something from her house or needed help finding their way around town or
There were some hos in the house, and they were all ugly. The room was filled with women wearing Christmas sweaters that did not match any of the other clothes on their bodies. One had a green sweater with white pom-poms on it; another wore a red one with snowflakes on it. They stood around looking like gifts that no one wanted to unwrap, or more like packages of dog poo wrapped up for your doorstep. I watched them from behind my computer screen as I typed away at stories about people who looked better than these ladies both in and out of sweaters.
“Hey,” said a girl with pink stripes running down her sweater, gesturing to me when she saw me watching
Lizzy’s mom was always on her for wearing sweaters in the summer, but she just couldn’t resist a good ugly Christmas sweater. She found one that had a reindeer with a Santa hat and it said “Ho Ho Ho” underneath. The moment she saw this watermelon pink sweater with little white snowflakes sprinkled all over it, Lizzy knew that this was the perfect gift for Mrs. Claus next year at their annual holiday party.
It was a cold December morning, with the snow falling heavily on the ground. The neighbors were all outside building snowmen and laughing by their Christmas trees. On one street lived an old woman who wasn’t feeling very festive this year due to her loneliness. No presents under the tree, no family coming over for dinner, just her alone in that big house with nowhere to go but upstairs to bed where she would stay until it was time for work again tomorrow. She didn’t know what day it even was anymore and probably wouldn’t have cared if she did anyway. It had been too long since anyone had given her a reason to celebrate; not like that last Christmas when her granddaughter came home from college and brought everyone together after years of est
Merry Christmas, Disembodied Voice.